General

Why do we care about our exes?

So what's the nuance?

This seems toxic... No matter the reason behind it

Not a normal question or a normal way of thinking,

Why are you going through it? If the thread isn't about you, why did you mention it?

Yeah, nothing good ever comes from dwelling on your ex. Y'all broke up for a reason.

Wanna point out that 3 people said you were being gross. The way you are lashing out isn't helping your situation either.

A bit of advice. If you aren't prepared for people to ask you why you are asking a question, don't ask it at all.

Just for the record. If we accept that the initial post is, vaguelly speaking, normal (vaguelly speaking because... what counts as "normal"?), then your reaction here is the first problem in this thread. You evaded the question and consequently left it unanswered.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four-sides_model

Munchies asked the question you evaded in order to get a clear idea of the self-revealing part of what you communicate in the begining. Specifically, what is the motive for you to bring other people's exes (as oposed to, say for example, themselves)?

You should answer this question so people can better judge by themselves if they want to participate in the thread or not. (For most people that is a matter of if you come across as suspicious zto them, something reinforced by you evading to answer the question.)

Edit to include:
In public discource, which a thread is, it doesn’t matter so much if the person asking you a question is toxic or not. You generally should answer regardless, if you are able, for other people who might also follow the conversation you're participating in.

dude, read the room... everyone who has responded told you: it's creepy!

rather than doubling, tripling and quadrupling down, either apologize or just move on - every response makes you seem more and more toxic.

I didn't read this as inherently toxic. I mean, it could be, though I don't know the poster at all. The way I read it was "Seeing an ex gain weight after a relationship is really tough, and adds extra difficulty, when it's already a challenge to not think about them". It could totally be someone looking to vent, or for some tools to make it easier.